The last day of last year and the first day of this year all got rolled into one long day. I haven't slept yet in the longest time ever. Each time I closed my eyes, I will get nightmares. Flashbacks will occur time and time again. Sleep is like a curse and the nightmare seems never ending. Nothing seems to be real anymore. I just wished I could wake up again and everything is alright.

I am really blessed with my family and friends. I know this sounds faggoty, but they've really been a huge help by keeping me occupied. I do get "lost" sometimes. When I stare into blank space, I think I kind of lose conscious for awhile.I have no recollection of what happened or is happening. It's like a reboot to my mind or something.

Perhaps I'll get used to it. Well, whatever comes my way, I guess I'll just roll with the punches.