It's almost 2 weeks into 2012 and only have I slowly begun to recover from the ordeal that I went through. Sure it might seem mild to many and nonsensical even! All that is slowly fading to black and I am right back on track.
Graduation is only 3-4 months away and my grades are nowhere near decent. In fact, many might find it horrendous and wonder what I have been doing for the past 7 semesters. Well, to list a few, it's been a struggle to juggle school, work(s), rugby and also relationships. While I might have failed in some department, I am certainly prevailing in others. In fact, I have even come back stronger in areas where I have failed.
I have never regretted any of the events that has happened in the past 7 semesters. In fact, I would gladly go through all of it again if given the chance. I do not understand why many of my peers are really looking forward to starting their careers. Don't any of them realize that this is the best part of life? Uni is the only time where you actually understand what is being taught because it is the only time where everyone is able to challenge the teacher. It is also the point in time where we are actually old enough to go wherever we want to with money and time constrains being the only obstacles. We can do whatever we want whenever we want. No adults are going to tell us that we can't do it.
I guess this is yet another stepping stone to the rest of our lives. I wonder what life would be like for me next year. Perhaps I would have gone on to do that Masters program. Perhaps I might be working. Who knows..time passes way to fast for us to be looking forward to the future so much to the point that we neglect the present.
Yesterday, I saw something on Tumblr ( I can't find it at this present time. Maybe if I can find it, I'll post it up) which goes something like,
"Do not forget that while we are growing up, our parents are growing old too.."
That has always struck a chord in me. I have always wondered how life would be like without them. However I try to imagine, I simply cannot comprehend a life without them. They have been there for me all my life- no matter how I have treated them. I admit that I am not perfect but I do the best that I can. In fact, I can stress this enough especially to myself that once I have enough money, the first thing I want to do is to send them on the Hajj. That is the very least that I can do for them after all these while. Their love for me has been rather unconditional. If it wasn't for the 2 years that I spent in green, I wouldn't have realized it. Even if I had without the help of those two years, I wouldn't have been able to appreciate them as much as I do after that life changing experience.
Life isn't easy. Then again, compared to what? I have always likened myself to the SEAL's training maxim- The only easy day was yesterday. I don't know why I was such in a hurry to grow up. Now that I am sort of all grown up, I am trying to slow time as much as I can however I can. One of the things which I would like to make a tradition is Ubin. Those 6 days spent with friends just after our O levels was simply enjoyable. Then, time did not mean anything to us as we did whatever we wanted whenever we wanted with the exception of meals.
About a couple of Wednesdays ago, going back to that place simply brings back memories. Besides being able to pride in the fact that I know my way around the place extremely well, it is something of a ritual which I could use to find myself again. The almost non-existent presence of time is something of a tragedy elsewhere in Singapore as we move faster and faster as a society. This rat race that we have set on the moment we emerged from out mothers is somewhat an abomination of what we were meant to be. It is sad that we could now choose to forsake everything else for personal glory. It is just to bad that we can only realize what we have done only after we have done. Perhaps, just perhaps, people could use a little deductive reasoning before they step forth and embark on something.
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