I have been weighed, i have been measured and i have been found been wanting. That is what i felt about myself after the final game today. I can bet that is what others felt about me after the final game today too. I disappointed my team mates. They didn't have to say it. I could feel it. All the mistakes that the team made, it started from me. And mistakes that i've made are not easily coverable by others because the mistakes are indeed extremely grave.

It was indeed a quicksand out there. One mistake led to another. The more i try to right it, the more mistakes i made. The more i struggle, the faster i'd sink. Then after the final whistle was blown, i found myself drowned...overwhelmed with disappointment that i cannot shake off...still.

Its like reaching for another piece of rock while rock climbing. You know you can reach for that piece, if you only dare to jump and let go all other pieces just so that for the vital piece of rock...the final one before i can reach my goals. But i froze. I hesitated. And i lost all footing. and so i fall...

Im starting my climb all over again. This time around i shall persevere. I know what i told someone as to why i felt extremely dissapointed. But i shall not have that fucked up attitude again. This time, everything is FTW!